Hi internet. Night time is the best time for moping, or for the newest iteration of that existential crisis you have every six months or so. Sometimes I feel like I really can’t handle this. And why should I? Maybe I should just leave. How long do you think it would take before they freeze my credit cards? Wouldn’t it be a lot less trouble for someone to come over and make me some soup and pretend to love me for a few hours until I get my shit together? I seriously just need some attention. EVERYONE needs some attention sometimes. Not to run away to Mexico. I’m not asking for a lot here.
You know what, Internet? I’m on “vacation” for 18 days and it’s making me crazy. Not because I miss working, I hate my job. I don’t even do any real goddamned work there. It’s because I’ve been alone for days! The longest conversation I’ve had is with the person who took my order at Starbucks. I can barely even get anyone to text me back, never mind hang out. Ugh. Never take a job where you end up moving every year, it does NOTHING for enhancing your circle of friends.
HEY INTERNET. I’m unhappy. I am not even going to tell you why, because for some reason it’s embarrassing to be so unhappy about it. It’s like it’s only ok to not have it if you didn’t want it anyway, if you don’t have it and you DO want it, then you’re just kind of lame and pathetic. Well that sucks.
Today I am sad because my knee really, really hurts. I really wish this would stop happening. Sometimes I think it’s all better because it doesn’t hurt for a while, but then it comes back. I wish this had never happened to me.
Oh, internet. Life is full of tribulation. Like when you spend several months thinking you’ll be doing one thing for your vacation, and then at the last minute it’s all “oh by the way, not really”… and then you have to go to Vegas and tan by the pool while drinking boozy slurpees. That’s a vacation that’s coming right up to soothe my anguish.
It’s been a while. I am sad because I am in HALIFAX. Because there isn’t much to do but drink and get fat. What a miserable place. 28 days.
Sad because I have to go spend six weeks of my summer in Halifax.
Sad because I never get enough sleep. Even when I sleep, I barely sleep. Always exhausted.
I can’t lie to you, internet, I am only the slightest bit sad today. But if I was more sad, which I will be eventually, I could easily hide it with these new sunglasses. A tactical purchase.
I’m sad because I realised my job doesn’t really do a goddamned thing to help people, I’ve wasted years of my life.